Fun Times With The Flash
by LycoX
Summary: A series of connected one shots in which Barry as the Flash annoys Detective Eddie Thawne and various others.
1. Chapter 1

**Fun Times**

**With The Flash**

**Chapter 1**

**Speeding Flash,**

**Annoyed Eddie**

**Disclaimer: This is going to be a series of one shots that are connected to one another. This will feature various situations in which Barry decides to annoy Detective Thawne for his attempts in trying to catch him. I was actually inspired by a story here that has a similar premise to this. Now... Let's get it on!**

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It was just another day on the streets of Central City. And on one of those streets was the good detectives known as Joe West and Eddie Thawne. Who were currently on a high speed pursuit for a thief who wasn't making it easy on them. Joe had been too focused on driving in order to catch the guy and it was why he had yet to call in Barry to help out. Granted the speedster wound up hearing about it anyway and was quickly on the way there. As for Eddie, he had hoped a bit that the Flash would be around to butt in so that he could finally arrest him. Unfortunately however, that just wsan't going to be in the cards for Eddie.

As the Flash finally sped by them to try and catch the thief, a wild idea appeared in his head that made him smile. Going back to where his surrogate father and Eddie were, he decided to run along side the passenger side of the police car that Eddie was in. This made the man feel a bit confused as to why the Flash was doing this. The window having already been rolled down made it much easier for Eddie to quickly be heard when he yelled out at the speedster. "In case you don't know, the thief is way in front of us! Unless you are just looking to pretty much arrest yourself to save me the trouble of doing it myself?"

Barry looked over at him with that smile still in place and proceeded to give him a raspberry. "No way! No how! You suck!" He responded back in a very high Chipmonk like voice. Which instantly annoyed Eddie.

Seeing that his boy had Eddie pretty distracted had allowed for Joe to smile at what Barry was doing. Oh he knew he shouldn't enjoy it, much less approve of it. But honestly Eddie made it so easy for the boy to do it! "Why are you harrassing me!?" Eddie really wanted to know, surely the guy had something better to do right?

"I'm harrassing you?" Barry asked back, feigning confusion to it.

"Yes! Harrassing me! Annoying me even!" Oh how Joe wanted to break down into laughter. Darned luck for having to be the driver.

A huge smile could be seen on the blurred face of the Flash as he kept on annoying Iris' boyfriend. "I don't think I'm doing that! Are you sure I'm annoying you?"

Eddie just couldn't believe it with this guy. Surely he had to know what he was doing right!? "YES! I'M VERY SURE!" He roared out.

By now, Barry had his hands on the back of his head acting like nothing out of the ordinary was going on as he ran alongside the car. "Well, are you?"

"Am I what!?"

"Annoyed of course!" God he was loving every minute of this!

Oh yes, Eddie was very annoyed indeed now. "YES! I'M VERY ANNOYED!"

Barry gave him a salute over that. "Well my work here is done! Whoo hoo hoo hoo!" And sped off to stop the thief. Happy as can be that he managed to annoy the good Eddie Thawne.

"Grr..." Was all Eddie really could do at that moment. Prompting Joe to finally start laughing at the entire thing now that he was able to slow down thanks to Barry's intervention.

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**Author's Notes: Now depending if the feedback/reactions I get are of the positive, I will continue on in doing this. I kinda thought this could be one way for Barry to deal with Eddie wanting to catch him. Look forward to hearing your thoughts!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Fun Times**

**With The Flash**

**Chapter 2**

**A Very **

**Bored Eddie**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the general idea you see within this story.**

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Detective Eddie Thawne's willingness to take on a day shift for somebody else was quickly turning into regret for him. As everytime he got a call or was on his way to handle a situation, he would quickly get a call saying it had been taken care of. And after the 10th time, he was beginning to grow both bored and paranoid. Bored cause of a lack of anything to do and paranoid because he was beginning to suspect that somehow The Flash knew he was getting called in to deal with the various situations he'd been called for. And currently, he was stationed in an alley near Jitters while enjoying a nice cup of hot coffee as he waited to get the next call from Dispatch. He was pretty tempted to send Iris a text, but figured she'd be too busy to respond at the moment.

_God I'm bored. _He whined in his head.

And to his dismay, he briefly saw a colored streak flash by him on the main road. _Great, likely off to interfere with more police business._ He groused to himself.

"Detective Thawne, this is Dispatch. We have a... Wait cancel that." The obviousness of that being the Flash made him growl.

It was then that he noticed the man himself standing inches away in front of him with a smirk on his face despite the blurryness. The Flash gave him a salute and took off. "Argh! I AM SO BORED BECAUSE OF HIM AND I CAN'T STAND IT!" His annoyance made him start hitting the steering wheel.

"OW!"

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**Author's Notes: Apologies if this seems lacking, I seemed to have a struggle in getting this one written. Hope you all enjoy this anyways!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Fun Times**

**With The Flash**

**Chapter 3**

**Carnival Shenanigans**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the idea you see within this story.**

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It had been Iris' idea to come to the annual Central City Carnival of Wonders and so far Eddie was enjoying himself. He was surprised though that Barry hadn't come and when he asked Iris, she only said that he had other plans tonight. Once he heard that, he figured Barry was going to be doing something with that Linda girl Iris had talked about a few times. Little did he know however that a certain annoyance in his life had been invited to the show to take part in it.

"And now! For one night only here at the Central City Carnival of Wonders is the latest wonder of not only this fair city but of the world! He is known simply as... THE FLASH!" The ringleader called out and Eddie instantly groaned at that. Something Iris didn't hear over the roaring approval of the crowd. A crowd she herself was part of.

The Flash suddenly appeared in front of an elephant who had been in the arena as well. Miss Tizzles as she was known grabbed him with her trunk and threw him up into the air and onto her back. Where he landed gracefully while crouching down and then standing tall with his arms wide open. Making for another round of applause to occur. Barry happened to have his own microphone with him as well and made sure to vibrate his vocal chords. "Thank you everyone! Its great to be here!" And as he looked at the audience, he managed to spot Iris and Eddie in the second row and got himself a great idea.

"Ah! And what's this I see!? Detective Thawne and his lovely Lady West!? Why yes, yes it is! Give those two a round of applause everyone!" And so they did, much to the confusion of Eddie but Iris was more surprised and flattered then anything else.

"I've also got it on good authority that Lady West is the one who actually wears the pants in the relationship." His joke made many in the audience laugh and even Iris wanted too as well but held it in in case Eddie happened to see her doing it. As is her man was beginning to look annoyed.

_Oh I wish these two could get along._ Before she knew it though, Eddie was suddenly covered in water causing him to splutter from the coldness of it.

"And now he's all wet! Detective, why don't you come on down and join me here!" Barry called out to him with a big cheesy smile on his face that could be barely seen thanks to him blurring his face.

Eddie decided to do it, if only to get in a good swing on the jerk. And when he went to throw a punch at him, the Flash moved quickly out of the way and helped upright Eddie and turned him to face the crowd with an arm around his shoulders. "Well wet shoes make for dangerous walks don't they!?" He got a roar of agreement to that as well.

Sadly, much to Eddie's annoyance. The speedster would keep him out there by his side and had him help out in a few things. However Iris had greatly enjoyed it and even resolved to give the show some very high praise in her next article. Something that would make Eddie sulk for nearly a week and Barry to prance around with a big smile on his face. Though anytime Iris asked him why he was doing that whenever she saw him, she'd just get told that something happened to leave him in a happy mood whenever he thought about it. Though she knew it couldn't have been his father's release from prison, so it must have been pretty huge for that to happen.

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**Author's Notes: And here we are with more annoyed Eddie! May there be much enjoyment!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Fun Times**

**With The Flash**

**Chapter 4**

**The Coming Of**

**Daffy Duck**

**Disclaimer: As always, I own nothing but the general idea you see within this story. Let's bring on the funny! This is still before Eddie finds out the Flash's identity.**

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For as long as Detective Eddie Thawne could remember, he had always strongly disliked the cartoon character of Daffy Duck. Many had found him a bit strange for that considering the character's likability. And even he himself could never quite figure out why he disliked the figure and just chalked it up to one of those things that just happen. Though a certain birthday party from his youth may have something to do with it, but he tried to never think too much on that horrible experience. Several exclamations took him away from the concentration he had on his work to find out what was going on. What he saw hoever was not something he liked at all. For making their way through the building was someone in a damned Daffy Duck costume of all things!

Eddie quickly went back to his work as if trying to hide himself in hopes the figure would just pass him by. Unfortunately though, the universe wasn't about to let him out of this one. "Well Thawne, you've really done it this time! Despicable, absolutely despicable!" The guy was even getting the voice and mannerisms down to the letter too.

Eddie looked up at the dressed figure in confusion, wondering what the Hell he was on about. And asked as much. "You know what I'm talking about buddy! You locked up an innocent rabbit and its despicable! He was just tryin' to get somewhere else for Duck Kind sake! I demand an explanation pronto!"

By now a crowd was looking on, a crowd that included Captain Singh and Joe West. Joe had to hide his smile behind a hand as he was getting an idea of who exactly was in the suit. Eddie was just thankful Iris wasn't around for this bout of embarrassment he was suffering at this weirdo's hands. "Look Mr. Uhh... Duck, I haven't arrested ANY rabbits at all. I think you need to sleep off whatever it is you're on."

Daffy just crossed his arms and giving off the impression he wasn't all that impressed by the man's words. "I think YOU need to sleep off whatever it is you're on mister! I saw you arrest Bugs Bunny! And while I sometimes don't like the rabbit, even I find that unfair! Unfair I say! Let the Rabbit go!" He started to chant that last bit, and soon the crowd even joined in. Well, aside from Singh anyway as he found the whole thing amusingly bizarre.

The poor harrassed Detective growled and quickly got out of his seat to apprehend the newest annoyance in his life. But the Duck moved quickly out of his way, causing him to stumble. And when he looked for where the annoyance was, he could be found laying on top of his desk. The sight angered him even more and he went after him again. But the Duck proved to be faster then him. "Woo-hoo-hoo! Sorry pal, you've gotta do better than that to catch me!" He started to hop around the large room in a way that was simply faster then he should have been able too.

Which was a clue in for Eddie as he finally realized just who the Hell this guy is. "FLASH!? IS THAT YOU!?"

Daffy immediately stopped the hopping around like a loon and zipped right up to him. The eye pieces allowed Eddie to see the man's eyes going up and down while he mocked him for figuring it out. He tried his luck in reaching out to grab the man but failed as he quickly moved out of the way. "Nuh-uh Eddie boy! Free Bugs! Hashtag it! Shout it on rooftops!"

He then sped over to Eddie and ruffled the man's hair and avoided another swipe by the man that was either meant to grab or hit him. "Woo-hoo-hoo! Woo-hoo-hoo!" He stopped momentarily to blow a raspberry in Eddie's direction before hauling off and going 'woo-hoo-hoo!' many times.

Joe could be seen doubled over laughing his butt off while a few of the officers were also seeing recording the entire thing. Singh only stood there wondering how the Hell he was going to keep this from happening again. He also wondered why the Flash kept doing this as the Task Force had been disbanded, but figured the Speedster just wanted to keep doing it since he knew he'd get a reaction from the Detective. Said Detective was red in the face and about ready to launch into a storm of cussing and the like.

But the thing that finally came out of his mouth was simply this. "FLAAAAAASH!" Oh yes, he was a very, very angry cop! Singh just sighed and considered yet again on how he could keep the Flash out of here. Ahh.. If he only knew!

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**Author's Notes: And here we are with more fun times! May there be many a laugh! If anyone wants to send in a suggestion for what Barry could do next to annoy Eddie. Bring em on! R and R!**


	5. A Speedster in Nanda Parbat

**Fun Times**

**With The Flash**

**A Speedster in**

**Nanda Parbat**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the idea you see within this story. Mockery I wound up doing of an image I saw on Facebook of Nyssa and Oliver's impending nuptials led me to decide to do this. Also, I'm going to ignore all the revelations about Wells/Eobard and warp things to where Harrison didn't die and gained a desire for revenge against Eobard after getting in a lucky hit on the man and stole Gideon from him who used a special function that only Barry knew about when he made her to send Eobard far away from the two of them. Girder never gets wacked either. Also this takes place several months after the last chapter and a few days after Barry managed to save Eddie from Eobard. Wells also listened to Hartley, but Eobard happened without them knowing it.**

**Also ignoring anything to do with the love/no love between Barry and Iris in favor of Barry/Linda. Cause come on now, that girl got shafted in favor of more drama between those two. Probably already said that in the past, but bears repeating.**

**Summary: Malcolm learns of the wedding to come and informs Team Arrow, Barry gets told when he randomly decides to call them for some advice, gets a wild idea, and despite reservations from the others, learns of the location of the LoA and heads there for some fun.**

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Holy crap was Barry thankful he had managed to talk Ray into allowing him use of Palmer Tech Funds and the jet! Cause damn was it far and he didn't even think he could have made it here unless he had several bags of calorie bars with him for it. When Cisco had heard of Oliver's new name, he was seriously not impressed by it and frankly, Barry had to agree with the man. And the speedster intended to fully mock this Ra's guy for his naming choices, and then repeat the process with Oliver. Sure he might get tons of Assassins after him, but it was the principle of the matter! And if he got to crash a wedding, even better! Besides, annoying the Hell out of Eddie kinda got old for him after Iris ranted at him again for the 12th time after she finally got tired of what he was doing for his hassling of the man. But seriously! The guy made it so darned easy for him to do it! Course her starting to rant at him may have something to do with the fact she was not happy about being kept in the dark.

He had to admit though, the sight of Nanda Parbat itself looked damned impressive! Prime picture material for a travel blog too! He pressed the button to turn on his comm and let the STAR Labs team know he made it there. Where again Wells had to make his opinion on what the speedster was doing known. "_Mr. Allen, I must state for the 8__th__ time over how juvenile this horrible idea of yours is. As there are other things you could be spending your time on._"

Barry had to sigh over that attempted buzzkill. Wells had made it no secret that he definitely did NOT approve of what Barry had been doing after he learned of it. Of course he had to learn about it when Detective Thawne had decided to go off on him for allowing the annoying speedy menace to bug him so damned much. The fact it was Barry made it ten times worse. "Look, I know you don't approve Dr. Wells, but this is important that I do this. Not only for Felicity, but for Oliver's state of mind. Who knows, maybe me doing this will snap him out of the brain washing this Ra's guy has done to him?"

"_And if he kills you Mr. Allen?_" Which for Harrison, he felt that was more of a pressing concern then anything else.

"I'll just have to ensure that doesn't happen." Boy if Oliver knew how he was acting a bit cocky right now, he'd probably get more then two arrows to the back!

The exasperated sigh on the other end made Barry smile and he sat down a rather large bag he had strapped to his back. And began pulling out buckets of red and green paint, along with two paint brushes. The sight of it all made Barry's smile widen even more. He also had several packs of toilet paper and other goodies inside the bag and made a mental note to thank Cisco yet again for having been able to find a way to make it so that the bag wouldn't be weighed down by all the stuff he had in it. He also had brought with him a giant speaker that Ray Palmer had rigged to be able to fly silently by remote control. Popping open a can of green and then a can of red, he dipped the two paint brushes into both and took off with a 'Woo-hoo-hoo!' that he tried to keep from being too loud.

If one happened to be seeing this, they would be witnessing the incredibly sight of a yellow blur painting the walls of Nanda Parbat in green and red streaks. Along with a few guards Barry had come across after he'd knocked them out. He also threw in toilet paper at random times, which would likely be pretty damned hard to get off if it happened to stay on any drying paint. And once he was done with his work, he went back a short distance to admire it all with a proud smile on his face. Then dusted off his hands for the heck of it. He grabbed another can of green paint and rushed off to the inside, also having a small bag on his side that had devices in them that went off at random intervals with either the sound of a donkey or a sheep.

Those devices had special sticky pads on them that was developed by Cisco which virtually made it nearly impossible to remove them. And once they were turned on, there was pretty much no turning them off unless you had the password for it. Once he used up the green paint, he chucked the can in a random direction and went back for a red can of paint. Along with a small cannon like gun with a big tank on it that he could strap to his side. The tank was also filled with a lot of glitter and he had more in his stash of goodies to use too.

Barry started humming to himself as he went about his work, though part of him wished Oliver would happen to come by so that maybe he could try and talk him back into sanity. And if he had to use his glitter cannon? Then so be it! After using up the second can he brought inside with him, he started blasting the glitter cannon everywhere. It was then that a League member showed up and got glitter blasted, causing him to stumble back in shock before rushing after Barry to eliminate the intruder. But Barry's speed allowed him to knock the man out before he could sound an alarm.

Barry got a wild idea after that and stripped the man down to his underwear and put on the League issued gear. Which nicely enough fit him pretty well with out much of an issue. Now he wasn't sure what he'd do to be convincing should another member start talking to him, but he figured it'd be a bridge to cross once he got to it. He also hid the glitter cannon behind his back under the coat so it wouldn't be seen. Though knowing his luck, a bulge would be noticable back there. His wondering around eventually brought him some luck in the form of crossing paths with Oliver who was firing off arrows at a target from a good distance away.

Deciding not to try and be secretive about it, he walks over to him and pulls out another of the animal noise devices. But before he could get any closer and turn the device on to blare it into Oliver's ear. The archer turned around with an arrow ready to strike him. "I don't think so Barry Allen. And now, I give you a choice; leave this sacred place or die by my hand."

Barry looked at him in shock before pulling off the League hood and mask. "Dude! Seriously!? I know the others told me about this, but it has to be an act of some kind right? I mean you can't possibly be under their control. Right? You're the freakin' Arrow man! Hero of Starling City and my mentor for Science's sake!"

If anything, that got him a glare that if it was possible, probably could have killed him. "Silence Speedster, I am nothing of what you speak. For that man is long dead now and its time you and those in Oliver Queen's life to accept that." Al Sah-Him told him in a detached tone of voice.

The Central City Speedster could only shake his head at his friend's words. And resolved to find a way to help him escape this madness. "You're wrong, you're so wrong its not even funny. And I'm gonna prove it. Maybe not today, but I will. And that's a promise Oliver."

His words must have struck a nerve in the other man, for Al Sah-Him fired off his arrow but it missed its mark thanks to his speed. Pulling out his glitter cannon, he fired it off straight into Oliver's face before attaching the animal noise device to the League gear he had on. The place he stuck it on however happened to be the chest. Which would prove to be damned annoying for the Archer very soon. He then pantsed him as he tried to do what he could to see properly after that damnedable attack on his face.

Barry gave a smirk at his work and ran off back to where his stash was while ditching the League gear, grabbed several rolls of Black Cats, ran off back inside and set them off in various places. The shouts of 'intruder' be heard now after that. He ran back outside and over to his stash, pulled out a radio and connected it to the speaker. Hitting play, the sounds of the Spice Girls song 'Wannabe' blasted out for all to hear. A song that he put on repeat as well. A man who could only be Ra's Al Ghul soon made his way out to where the blasted noise was coming from with many of his Assassins following him, along with Nyssa who was trying to keep herself from either smiling or laughing at the sheer chaos that was happening tonight. Barry figured that Oliver must still be inside somewhere trying to get the glitter off his face.

Which, considering it was a whole lot of it, would take him a good while. That is if he didn't trip over his fallen pants and knock himself out. Something he knew he would have laughed his butt off if he knew for sure of, and maybe get on camera thanks to Cisco's thinking when messing around with the suit. "WHAT LUNACY IS THIS!?" Ra's roared out very unhappily, the man also wondered where the Hell Al Sah-Him was at this moment as he SHOULD be right here by his side to take this menace down!

Barry shut off the music so that he could be heard easily. "Well I wouldn't call it lunacy, more like taking a stand against you and your tactics. Cause let's face it Mr. Demon's Head, you're a whacko! Oh, and you suck too. You suck so hard that vacuum cleaners can't even comprehend it."

"You would do well to mind your manners boy. For such talk could earn you a death sentence. As it is, invading the sanctity of my home and trashing it will have earned you a long stay of torture before I end your life." Then he would seek out all this fool knew and end their lives too. And they would forever curse his name in the Afterlife for his actions against him.

That actually made Barry gulp a little due to some fairly nasty images he was getting in his head now. "Yeeeaah... I think I'll have to say no to that if you don't mind. I have things to do and all that would make it pretty hard to do." Like make out with Linda for one, maybe steal the Captain's sandwich again too.

The look on Ra's' face clearly told him he wasn't impressed and nor did he gave a damn about what he had in mind. "I believe you will be sorely disappointed then." He then gave a slight nod and his men charged after Barry.

The Speedster had other ideas though as he turned the speaker back on and pressed a button that Cisco told him to press as a just in case. The result made him damned happy he was on the speaker's side and had some specially made ear plugs in his ears as a wave of sound came roaring out of the speaker. The sound wave sent many of the Assassins to their backs, thoroughly knocked out. The sight of it made Ra's' blood boil in absolute rage, something he hadn't felt in years. "NYSSA! FIND YOUR INTENDED AND BRING HIM HERE NOW!" The true Heir complied with her father's wishes, though she intended to take a little bit of time in the process to find him. And she could always blame the length of time on the fact Nanda Parbat being rather large.

The woman headed back inside with a rather large smile on her face now that no one else could really see it since quite a few were still on assignments or a good ways from here due to certain styles of training. Why they tended to do it at night was something she wasn't entirely sure of however. And nearly 30 minutes later, she and her intended who thankfully had his pants up now. Found themselves witnessing the sight of Ra's Al Ghul covered in green and red paint, gag in his mouth, stripped down to his underwear and sock, and on his side as his hands and knees had been tied closely together. The man could be heard grunting in rage at the embarrassment he'd been made to suffer. The fact that the speaker was continually going 'Woo-hoo-hoo!' wasn't helping matters any either.

Nyssa did what she could to hold in her laughter but couldn't stop the full blown smile that appeared on her face. Something Al Sah-Him noticed as he managed to shake off his shock at his master bound and gagged in such an embarrassing way. Barry would pay, and he would see to it personally! "Nyssa! You dare smile at the sight of your father in such a state!? You bring him dishonor!"

Ohh how she wanted to slap the ever loving crap out of him! "Of course my intended, I deeply apologize for my weakness here. Come, let's free my father of his bonds." The words made her strongly want to vomit. She got a curt nod in response to that and the two quickly made work of freeing the older man.

Once they got him free, he pushed them away as he got up quickly with pure rage seen on his face and could even be heard growling. Something that had Nyssa's eyebrows raising a bit as she'd never heard her father do such a thing. Al Sah-Him just stood there looking stoic, waiting for orders. "I... Have not... Felt such hate and rage in many years. Once you two are married, I wish the two of you to seek this soon to be DEAD FOOL, beat him to an inch of his life, then bring him before me. WHERE I SHALL END HIM BY CUTTING OFF HIS HEAD!" The ancient man rarely ever lost his composure, but this night had not been a good one at all.

Nyssa and her intended looked at one another before looking to Ra's again. For Nyssa, she intended to find some way to send out a message to Laurel to warn this intruder of what her father plans if she knew of him. And she had a feeling Laurel did, much the same for her intended. His actions here tonight was the least she could do for all the amusement she'd gotten from it.

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**Author's Notes: Ain't I a stinker? Look forward to your thoughts! The next chapter of Making The Call will be coming very soon as well and its looking to be another big chapter. Up next, Eddie in a closet!**


	6. Trapped In A Closet

**Trapped In**

**A Closet**

**(And no, this isn't an R-Kelly kind of thing)**

**Disclaimer: As usual, I own nothing but what you see here. Special thanks to A Fab Ice Cream for this fantastic idea! Also, this goes back several months before the trip to Nanda Parbat and several days after the Daffy Duck incident. Also as someone pointed out about Wally West being more likely to do things as he did in chapters 4 and 5. To be honest, my only real experience with Wally has been the Justice League/Unlimited cartoon from a few years back.**

**Summary: Barry locks up Eddie in a closet until he says the magic words.**

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When Barry had gotten this idea, a huge smile had found its way to his lips as he imagined the fun it would bring. Well, fun for him anyway as Eddie would be locked up in a closet until he said the magic words Barry wanted him to say. When the STAR Labs crew saw the look on Barry's face, they all knew what it meant as it meant he was planning trouble. Dr. Wells, despite his failures to get Barry to stop being a pest towards the Detective, never wavered in trying to talk sense into the Speedster. Caitlin and Cisco however had long since given up and were just waiting for the right moment to say 'I told you so' once Thawne learned of who he really was. Something Barry didn't ever think was going to happen.

And so, stuck in a closet was Eddie Thawne. A closet that happened to be his own that was being blocked off so that he couldn't escape. Adding to his misery was the fact he had no access to his cell phone to get someone over here and get the red menace away from him. "LET ME OUT OF HERE YOU SPEEDING MENACE!"

"Nope, sorry chief but no can do." Came Barry's vibrated voice as he leaned against some drawers while he stared at the closet doors with a smirk on his face.

"I'M A DETECTIVE, NOT A CHIEF!"

"Whoa! Really!? I thought you were Daffy Duck!"

"I HATE DAFFY DUCK!"

Barry doubled over laughing as he no longer could contain it, thankfully he was able to keep his voice vibrating as it would not be a good thing if he was laughing in his normal voice. "STOP LAUGHING AND LET ME OUT SO I CAN ARREST YOU!"

The Speedster just continued to laugh for another few minutes until another crazy idea popped into his head. "You know Daffy, this reminds me a lot of R-Kelly's 'Trapped in the Closet'." Only there's no midget or overly long and somewhat insane story to be had here.

Barry could hear thumping after that and guessed that maybe the good Detective was banging his head on something in there. "Hey now, don't hurt yourself in there. Wouldn't want ya to get brain damage!"

"I'LL SHOW YOU BRAIN DAMAGE!"

"Sheesh! No need for such violent threats! And can ya use your inside voice already!?"

"THERE'S A NEED! A HUGE NEED FOR IT WHEN IT COMES TO YOU! AND NO, NOT UNTIL YOU LET ME OUT!"

Barry could only sigh in contented joy at the havoc he was causing here. "Look, how about you use your inside voice and then we can talk about the terms of letting you out. M'kay?"

Eddie sighed in annoyance and decided that playing along would be for the best. If only so that he could arrest this punk, un-mask him, and throw him away in prison for life! "Fine, happy now?"

"Immensely good sir! Immensely! Now, as for the terms of letting you out. You just have to say 'The Flash is Awesome'."

_Like Hell I will!_ No way in Hell would he do something like that!

"No way you speeding menace, that will only inflate your ego!"

Barry let out a fake gasp of hurt at that. "Why Detective, how unkind of you to say!"

"If you can't handle the truth, then get out of the frying pan."

"Good one!"

Eddie thumped his head again and winced at the throbbing he was starting to feel. "Oh shut up and let me out already." He groused.

"Nope, not until you say the magic words." He sing songed.

"I refuse! You hear me!? I refuse!"

The Speedster made sure Eddie could hear his obvious fake sigh of exasperation. "Well I guess I'm just gonna have to bring out the big gun then."

"Big gun? Like what? An hour of Daffy Duck?" Eddie winced at that bout of stupidity.

"Oh! Fantastic idea sir! But no, instead its something far more interesting judging by an earlier reaction of yours."

Eddie felt a sense of dread enter him. "That wasn't anything but me expressing my dislike of being stuck in here!"

"Uh-huh, if ya say so Eddie. But now? Now its time to bring out some R-Kelly!" He whooped after that and rushed off to get a radio and a certain song that would nicely apply to this particular situation.

And soon, the sounds of R-Kelly filled Eddie's ears causing him to strongly wish he was deaf or had something to block out the music with. _I hate my life! If there is a God out there, he'll do something to get me out of this!_

"I HATE YOU!" That declaration only served to get an increase in volume, making the trapped man groan from it all.

"TO KNOW ME IS TO LOVE ME!"

_Whatever helps you sleep at night you nut job!_ And if this speeding menace could read minds, he hoped he saw that thought! Would serve him right!

Barry then lowered the music so he wouldn't have to yell again. "Ya know Detective Duck, I can easily play this mix I made of the Trapped in the Closet series all day long on repeat." And he could easily take care of any problems that come up with out much of an issue unless said problem was a meta human.

"You can't be that cruel! What would Iris think!?" Poor Eddie however had no clue that his girlfriend happened to be a fan of the artist's music.

"Well I'm pretty sure she could easily find it as a bonding experience for the two of you. If she likes his music anyway. And I could so be cruel if I wanted!" And then turned the music up a bit louder.

"ALRIGHT FINE! I'LL SAY IT! THE FLASH IS AWESOME! THE FLASH IS AWESOME!" Barry smiled widely and turned off the music, making the man sigh in relief.

"Now was that so hard?" He called out playfully and got a grumbled mess of words in return.

And before Eddie knew what was going on, he found himself suddenly at the precinct. Though the stares he was getting worried him a little until Captain Singh came up to him. The man already having realized his detective had gone through another episode with the Flash if the look on his face was anything to go by. He didn't figure the man for an R-Kelly fan however. "Nice shirt Thawne." And walked off with a shake of his head.

Eddie looked down in confusion and realized that somehow with out his realizing, that the Flash put him in a t-shirt from a certain artist's merchandise and grew red in the face. "FLAAAAAAASH!" His roar caused everyone to look at him in shock and for a few to laugh as they quickly realized what had happened.

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**Author's Notes: And here we are good buddies! I'm considering tying this with the drunken Barry story I did. Curious on what y'alls thoughts would be on that. Special thanks once again to A Fab Ice Cream for this prompt. And also, to the no named guest who couldn't be bothered to sign in when he or she left a review on another story and pretty much attacked me. Despite the fact I don't owe you an explanation for why it was more then just lost computers and writer's block. Why not log in the next time you leave such a fantastic review? That way I can actually respond to it. Plus, it was the third chapter that took me awhile to write. NOT the first two chapters. Anyways, hope you all enjoyed this one!**


	7. Chapter 7

**The Lamentations**

**Of Eddie Thawne**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but what you see here.**

**Summary: Eddie laments of his troubles concerning the Flash to Iris at Jitters.**

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When Iris had gotten a call from her boyfriend to come meet him at Jitters for her lunch break, she simply thought it was going to be an enjoyable time between the two. But she turned out to be absolutely wrong as Eddie had started going off about all the Hell that blasted Speedster had been putting him through. Admittedly she found a lot of what the Flash did to be funny, though the closet thing was a bit much. Now if she had been invited to take part in staying in that closet with him, she wouldn't have minded as much over that instance. But honestly, the guy wasn't meaning any harm by what he was doing! Well except for maybe years of therapy but she was sure she could help out with a little tender loving care on her part. Something she was sure Eddie would be receptive too once she managed to convinced him over it.

While Iris wasn't too happy over how things were going, many of those in Jitters honestly found it all amusing and wouldn't have minded if the Flash showed up just then to bother the man. Okay, so maybe a few of them were wanting him to stop talking since he had been going on and on. "I just don't get it Iris! I really don't! I'm damned close to telling the Captain I want to disband the task force! Maybe if I do that, that annoying menace will leave me alone!" Iris had to admit that him disbanding the task force would be a nice thing to do. Though she wasn't about to say that as it might make him think she's not on his side. Gotta be a loyal girlfriend and all that.

As he ranted, Barry and Linda came into Jitters hand in hand with smiles on their faces as they talked about whatever. The sight of those two instantly made Iris curious as Barry himself had told her the two were done. _Guess they must have decided to give it another shot._ She reasoned to herself and feeling that odd pang of jealousy again in her.

_Gosh! Why do I keep feeling that way!? Its not like I have sole right to him or anything!_ Her mental debate had caused her to ignore Eddie and he had definitely taken notice due to how she was staring off into space.

"Iris!" He finally called out, causing her to snap out of her thoughts.

"Huh!? Oh! I'm so sorry! I just spaced out there for a second." She told him with an apologetic smile.

"Uh-huh..." He responded with a guarded look about him as he stared at her, as if trying to figure out if she was intentionally tuning him and his rants out or not.

She just gave him a little glare over that, which thankfully made him back off. "Maybe you should just try talking with the Flash? Might help you two get on better footing with one another." Iris suggested reasonably. After all, if two of her favorite guys could get along life would be great. Add Barry to that and it'd be fantastic!

Boy if she only knew! Eddie regarded that for a few monents, considering it heavily. "I... Guess we could do that. But I'd be liable to hit him first before talking anything out." Iris had winced a little at that as something like that could just make the Flash harass her boyfriend even more!

"Might not be the best of ideas there." She told him reasonably, making him sigh as he knew she had a point.

**Meanwhile with Barry and Linda**

The two had indeed happily come into Jitters and while they had noticed Iris and Eddie, the two were far more interested at the time with getting themselves some good ol' java into their systems. Things had been pretty darned great between the two ever since he had shown up at her place pretty drunk thanks to a concoction of Caitlin's. Something she had profusely thanked the girl for, even going so far as to hug her even. Caitlin wound up feeling even more accomplished by that and it left her with a smile on her face for the rest of the day afterwards. She even promised Linda she'd make more of her special brew after the two girls had a little private chat. But the doctor highly suggested to the girl that she ensure he wouldn't get out of the house and cause chaos while innebriated. Linda made a promise not too and that she'd even tie him down if it was necessary. Though the heavily implied innuendo with that had Caitlin herself blushing a little.

The fact Linda knew about Barry's identity as well from that night was an immense help too since he wouldn't have to make up a lie to her when something Flash related came up. The sports reporter found herself a little curious if her man's speed could definitely be applied in bed. But since they had only recently re-connected with one another that particular subject hadn't been something she wanted to bring up just yet. But good lord if he didn't make a move in that area soon she was going to get a bit upfront with him! She got wanting to take it slow, and even understood his reasonings. But her's was a passion that couldn't be forever denied by his logical reasoning. Something Barry himself was starting to get a good idea of thanks to several things she'd been doing recently.

While the two started to enjoy their good ol' cups of java and enjoyable banter between one another, the two could easily hear Eddie go off about the Flash. Something Barry smirked a little about and got an elbow in the side for it when Linda saw it. Though she was smiling a little herself since some of what he tended to do was pretty hilarious. Like that time with the Mime crook, something that was all over the internet and the talk about it still hadn't died down yet. Thankfully for Eddie Thawne's sanity, he hadn't been around for that one. Then she noticed a gleam suddenly show up on her man's face and it made her pretty curious. "Alright Ghost Man, whatcha got cookin' in that head of yours?"

He smirked at her and wiggled his eyebrows at her. "Oh, you'll see. I'll be back in a few." Before he could leave however, the girl grabbed him by the hand. Making him look back in confusion and she raised her own eyebrows at her as if seemingly indicating he should do something first.

"Oh!" She gave a little smirk of her own as her man got the hint. And happily her a kiss, something she wasn't about to about to let end soon as she started to hold tightly on to him. Causing a few of the patrons to wolf whistle at the two.

The whistling got Eddie's attention and he looked to where it was possibly coming from and saw to his surprise that it was Barry and Linda having what looked like a soul searing kiss by the way the two seemed into it. He turned back to Iris with a confused look on his face. "I thought those two ended things?"

Iris looked at the two before looking to Eddie again. "Yeah but I guess they decided to try things out again." Never mind the fact she felt there was someone she felt could be a whole lot better for her Bear. But at least he was happy and that's the important thing here.

After their intense kiss, Barry and Linda gently put their foreheads together, enjoying the moment between themselves and Barry hardly even wants to bother with leaving to go do his idea now. "Miss Park, your kisses are way hotter then a ghost pepper." That earned him a laugh from his girlfriend.

"Well well Mr. Allen, you do know how to sweet talk a girl." She told him happily while pleased as Hell over his compliment.

He laughed in return over that. "Only where you're concerned Miss Park, only where you're concerned."

"Good!" And pleased with her man's words, gave him another hell of a kiss before letting him go.

Though she could tell he wasn't all that willing to leave. "Look at it this way, the sooner you do it and get it done, the sooner you can get back to me."

Barry considered that for a moment and realized his girlfriend was right on the money about that. "You are totally right! Be back soon!" And with that, he happily walked off and out of the cafe as Linda waited in anticipation to see what her Ghost Man had in mind for this occasion.

**And now back to Iris and Eddie**

Unfortunately, Iris failed to see Barry leave as her boyfriend had gone into another rant about the Flash. This time how about the menace had given him an entire year's worth of pink frilly socks with his first name embroidered on to them. Making Iris laugh a little at the thought of him wearing those, which got her a scowl but it didn't really stop her from laughing. Soon enough the Flash himself tip toed his way into Jitters and gave everyone who saw him the indication to keep silent about his being there so as not to ruin the surprise. Linda so wanted to laugh but managed to keep herself from doing it. Barry got up close to Eddie from behind and started mimicking the man. And even doing wild hand gestures, the sight of it for Iris was a test in will power to keep from staring and or laughing her butt off since she saw him putting a finger to his lips to not give away the fact he's there.

While Barry was making himself busy by mocking Eddie, he found himself wishing he had a sign with him to wave around that would add further insult to injury. Like 'Eddie sucks, Flash rules!' or some such thing like that. Those in the cafe were starting to have trouble in trying to keep from laughing and it was something Eddie himself was starting to notice as he took a few deep breaths after another Flash rant. Looking around him and wondering what the heck was going on, he failed to notice the Flash behind him as the Speedster had crouched a bit low to avoid being seen. And when the cop turned his attention back to Iris, Barry started to bust a move or two on the floor. Making for a few more laughs. Which Eddie tried to ignore as he went on about how he had to deal with a River Dance group who claimed they were asked to come to his place and give a darn good performance two days ago.

Which honestly had been a nightmare for him considering he was trying to sleep! Barry stood up again and started the mimicking again, even doing a little River Dance styled dancing himself. Linda had to walk out so that she could let out the full on belly laugh that was threatening to come out. Iris finally started up herself with laughter when the red suited Speedster started Moon Walking. Eddie wound up with annoyed expression on his face as he wondered just what the Hell his girlfriend found so darned funny. The fact she wasn't able to give him a straight answer wasn't helping things either. He took a deep breath as he realized something just then.

"He's behind me isn't he?" He asked her resignedly, not even bothering to look behind him. Course if he had, he would have seen that the Flash was basically trying to tell her not to say anything. Though he was making a big joke out of it as he gave an impression of how that would play out.

"Yes! He is!" She was able to get out between bouts of laughter, the Speedster putting his hands on his sides and giving her a stern look that didn't seem all that stern increased her laughter some more.

Eddie's eye twitched and looked behind him to see the menace in his life behind him. And when they made eye contact, the Flash decided to wave at him with a smile on his hard to see face. The actions irked the Detective and rushed out of his seat to try and do something to the menace, but unfortunately for him the Flash proved to be as fast as always and was out of the door. With Eddie following in pursuit, though once he got out of there, the menace was long gone. And unknown to the good Detective, Linda was also long gone with him as well.

Growling and cursing under his breath, Eddie let out an angry yell that quite a few were becoming used too. "FLAAAAAASH!" He roared out as his face became red in anger. His outburst sending everyone including Iris inside Jitters into full on laughter.

"I'LL GET YOU! I SWEAR IT!" He roared out again and had to strongly resist the urge to hit something.

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**Author's Notes: And here we are good folks! RIP to Eddie in one hell of a first season finale. You guys think he'll somehow make a come back? And if this would be considered bad form to run after that finale, I deeply apologize.**


	8. Fun Time!

**Fun Time!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but what you see here. **

**Summary: Its chaos in the streets as the Flash manages to get everyone he can to have a little fun!**

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The sight before Captain Singh, Detectives Thawne and West was one like never seen before. And at the center of it all was the Flash himself encouraging it all! The sight you ask about? Well let's just say it was straight out of a scene from The Mask, complete with dancing but only some singing from the red clad Speedster himself. He was also dressed in the brightest orange possible that made him look like a damn beacon and over all looked like a horrible wanna be gang banger too. The Speedster could be heard singing a variation of a certain song related to school being out. Only it was more targeted at Eddie Thawne, much to the man's annoyance. Joe had to keep from laughing when his adopted son made a reference about how Captain Singh had some serious sandwich making skills. Something the Captain himself was wondering about until he finally realized that that was how his sandwiches kept disappearing at random times!

"That punk! I put time into making those and he just grabs them as he pleases! Detectives, its time to make an arrest!" The three men made their way towards the Flash, determined to arrest him and put him away for a good long while. Well, two of the three were anyway and Joe couldn't wait to see what his boy did next.

It wasn't easy reaching him either considering the size of the crowd and all the dancing they were doing. "HEY! PARTY'S OVER!" Singh yelled out as they finally got to Barry who was standing on top of a car.

"Aww snap, its some busta ass Five-O!" That response made even Joe raise his eyebrows up in surprise and slight annoyance since he hated that kind of talk! And Barry knew it too!

"Now that we've established that, you are to get down from there so that we can arrest you." The good Captain told him with his arms crossed and a glare aimed right at the Flash.

The Flash scoffed at that idea with a shake of his head. "What'chu wanna arrest me fo'!?" That got a few indignant responses of 'Yeah!?' from the peanut crowd as well, making the red clad gangsta looking Speeder smirk at his fellow cops.

Eddie beat the Captain to it however when he told the Speedster it was because of being a public disturbance. "Oh and for striking a police officer!" He added in for good measure.

"Looking like a complete idiot dressed like that, not to mention the way you're talking." Joe cut in with a smirk at his surrogate son as the boy couldn't really respond to that properly until much later.

"Let's not forget practicing vigilantism and stealing my sandwiches!" Added in Singh who was actually more concerned and annoyed about his sandwiches being stolen then anything else!

Unfortunately for them, the crowd just booed them, causing Barry to smirk at them again. "Hey, my peeps is right yo! Now clears out befo' I gots tah get gangsta on y'alls. And Blondie? For yo need tah know, I was doped up against muh will yo! Othawise I wouldn't have even gone and beat yo white boy self!" He protested, cause damn if it wasn't time to let it go already!

Eddie just scoffed at that as he could also list the numerous times the Speedster had pretty much harassed him in the last few weeks and it was pretty much grounds to arrest him! "Yeeeeaah… If you say so. But again, get down from there and come with us quietly as you're only making this worse on yourself." Even if he was making it worse on himself as well in the end cause he just knew Iris wasn't going to be to happy with this!

Instead of responding however, Barry sped off and before any of the three knew it, they were all dressed in Ballet outfits. Much to the amusement of the crowd! Their tops also had pictures of Teletubbies on them too for good measure. Normally Joe wouldn't be touched but Barry just had to get him back for that comment even if he was to catch Hell for it later! "Dayum boys! Y'alls lookin' good in da Hood! Yo peeps, let's get dese fools partyin'!" And the crowd cheered and split the three up to show them how to have a good time.

All three of them vowed retribution that day upon the Flash, well for Eddie he was just doing it even more. Joe was hating the fact he couldn't even ground Barry for this! But then again he could probably get Dr. Wells to design some kind of punishment for the boy that would be all too fitting. _You mess with fire Bear, expect to get messed with right back!_ The good West vowed in his head as he tried to get away from the party goers looking to show him how to have fun. Not that he needed a lesson since he perfectly knew how!

_I'm starting to get why Thawne gets so damn angry!_ Singh thought and was glad Rob wasn't here for this as he would have been likely to encourage this whole thing!

"I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! FLAAAAAASH!" Bellowed a certain Pretty Boy, who groaned when everybody else started to scream loudly as well. Why he had no damn clue and just wanted to get the Hell out of there! And God help him if any of this was on the news tomorrow!

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**Author's Notes: BOOM goes the dynamite! Sorry for not updating this one for awhile as it seemed kind of wrong considering what happened to Eddie, course I could just be being weird about the whole thing. However I do hope you guys enjoyed this one! And remember, suggestions are always welcome! R and R!**


	9. The Mania of Our Lives!

**The Mania of**

**Our Lives!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the fun you see here! I'm also dedicating this chapter to SilentEevee as he or she helped inspire this one with a suggestion that they made awhile back. **

**Summary: Eddie finally gets to do what he's been practically dreaming of doing for weeks now. Or does he?**

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Detective Eddie Thawne was one Hell of a happy man right now. Why was he happy you ask? Well other then the fact he and Iris had had a great morning together before they went off for their respective days of work, the man FINALLY got the chance to arrest the red clad menace known as The Flash! Whom was also currently in the back seat of his car on the way to the precinct. The speeding menace had been going around town in what basically amounted to a brown mini tornado with red streaks of lightning running through out it. And when he had stopped at various points for whatever reason, those that had seen him reported having seen him wearing a Tazmania Devil costume. Why? No one really knew, but the crazy menace was imitating the cartoon figure damn well!

Now this was a cartoon figure Eddie actually liked, but seeing the Flash dressed as the character had annoyed him a lot. But then he got a great idea that if the Flash was being too busy spinning around like a cartoon character, he wouldn't notice something in his path before it was too late. So the Detective grabbed a banana peeling from a nearby trash can and timed it just right that he was able to throw it in the twirling mini tornado's path. And sure enough he went slipping and landing hard on the ground that it knocked him for a loop long enough for Eddie to arrest him. Much to the annoyance of the various onlookers around. Pretty Boy had to resist yelling out in glee over his finally capturing the menace but once he was somewhere private would definitely do it!

Even if Iris wasn't going to be too happy with him, but hey he could deal with it! He was still a bit miffed she had laughed her head off at the sight of him in a Ballet outfit and when she heard her dad had been dressed the same way had wound up laughing even harder. Though neither of the two could quite figure out why Barry had been grinning so widely when he learned about it, but figured he was just trying to keep from laughing possibly. Ahh.. If only they knew! "You are going to go away for a really, REALLY long time pal. Especially once someone figures out how to make you be as slow as the rest of us."

However, this is where fate decided to play its cruel, cruel hand on the man as a red streak flashed by him and the man found himself coming to a slowing stop. And right in front of the Flash himself! But, more horrifyingly enough, the one he thought was the Flash was standing right next to him! Now that he thought about it, the other figure was looking a heck of a lot shorter too! How in the Hell did he fail to notice that!? Was the menace making him that far gone!? The bane of his existence waved cheekily at him and he could see his car keys in the Speedster's waving hand. His Tazmania pal was laughing in its own little way too, much to the growing annoyance of Eddie Thawne. Frowning to himself and gripping the steering wheel tightly enough to make his knuckles go white, he quickly got out of the car to confront the two.

As one speeding menace practicing vigilantism in the city was bad enough, but two? Absolutely no way in Hell! He'd quit and go elsewhere if he had too! "Detective, wonderful as always to see you. And I see you've met my little robotic friend here." The Flash said with a nod to the head.

Robotics? How was that even possible!? STAR Labs might be somehow capable of that, especially where Cisco Ramon was concerned but he couldn't fathom why they would do it! Unless it was somehow meant to be an experiment that this annoyance found out about and stole it afterwards! _That has to be it! Wihch means this is just one more crime to add to the list!_ Eddie thought happily and was also so very, very wrong.

"I would say the same, but we both know I'd be lying." Eddie responded back from where he stood, wondering how he might be able to arrest the Flash this time around.

The Flash nodded at him again. "Come to the Light! We've got Cookies and hand slaps for liars! Cause we both know that the longer you keep coming after me, the more I will keep doing this until otherwise. So come on, join the Light and know the joys of being cool like yours truly." Flash told him with what looked to be a beaming smile and a thumb pointed at himself.

This gained him a frown and also having Eddie think that the wacko was trying to get him to join some kind of cult that drinked special kool-aid. Well no sir, he wasn't going to be doing anything of the sort thank you very much! "Are you in some kind of cult?" The Detective asked suspiciously.

"Ummm what? No, I mean what? I just thought it sounded cool to say." The Speedster replied a bit flabbergasted. Really!? That's what he thought of him!?

Nodding at that while still suspicious to be on the safe side, Eddie decided enough was enough and started walking towards him. But incoherent babble from the Tazmania look a like started up and before the man could so much as blink. Taz was gone and tearing up his car to pieces in a matter of seconds before coming back to the Flash's side with a satisfied smile on its face as it snacked on a piece of his car's fender. Eddie's eyes had gone wide and Flash had pretty much doubled over in laughter as even he wasn't expecting that to happen! "Why… You!" Oh yes, our fair Detective was most certainly at a loss for words here!

And before he knew what was going on yet again, he had been surrounded by the Taz look a like this time. Thankfully nothing was eaten off him but much to his mortification, his pants were down to his ankles and everyone could see his yellow polka-dotted boxers underneath. This sent the Flash into even more laughter. "Hah! It… Ha ha! Looks like you… Ha ha ha! Lost your pants!" Barry roared out happily, much to the pure anger of Eddie who started to growl.

With another jaunty wave and a throw of his keys at his feet, the Flash and the Taz look a like were gone in the blink of an eye. Grumbling to himself incoherently, Eddie looked up into the sky wondering what the Hell he'd done to deserve all this! Making his arms go wide, he started to scream obscenities into the air, making onlookers gasp in shock at what they heard. Said obscenities also included his hate for the Flash and now for the Tazmania Devil as well. Unknown to him, Taz had also funnily enough attached a message to his back that he happily stunk.

He went to move for his keys, but wound up falling flat on to his face as Taz had also tied his shoe strings together. He went to get up with a groan, but quickly gave up the notion instead as he was just too darn embarrassed to get back up. "I hate him! And I hate my life!" He moaned out as he laid there with everyone else watching and or laughing at the sight of him. Some were also even recording this, one of them being Linda who was so going to get a good laugh when she saw Iris' face when the girl saw this!

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**Author's Notes: Ahh… Ain't I a stinker? Thanks again to SilentEevee for the inspiration for this and I hope you and everyone else really enjoyed!**


	10. Iris West Pulls an Intervention

**Iris West Pulls**

**An Intervention**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but what you see here.**

**Summary: Iris finally decides to stage an intervention to get two of her favorite boys to get along better.**

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After Iris West had witnessed weeks and months of interactions between her boyfriend and cop Detective Eddie Thawne and the heroic Speedster known as The Flash, interactions that often led to her boyfriend having an increased hatred for the red clad Speedster after each one. The girl felt it was high time her two boys sat down and talked out their differences and she intended to be the mediator so things stayed as calm as they could be. This task had taken awhile to set up as both were fairly reluctant to do it, well more so on Eddie's part then The Flash's. She had even tried to get Barry involved but he kept refusing as he felt it was none of his business. Linda when she heard about it had made a joke suggesting that she make a news story out of the whole thing as it'd be something the city would really enjoy as it was bound to go off the rails.

Iris only rolled her eyes at that unhelpful suggestion and would later find that her own father was just as unhelpful in the whole thing. Heck the man found it funny as could be! But thankfully STAR Labs in the form of Harrison Wells had come to her side and the intervention was set up there. Wells when asked about it, merely told the reporter that as someone who occasionally helped to look after the Speedster in addition to two others, he felt something needed to be done. In reality the man honestly felt that Barry had a far better way to be spending his time then harrassing the likes of Eddie Thawne and various others. And agreeing to take part in this intervention of Miss West's was the best solution.

Even if the man did feel it was very likely to go south. Joining the intervention, if only to watch was Joe West, Harrison Wells, Linda Park, Caitlin Snow, Cisco Ramon, and the Arrow himself. Something that made Iris honestly nervous despite the fact he'd been making strides to not be seen as the Hood anymore. Linda was mostly there to record it for her's and Barry's own personal amusement after she'd promised to not hand the tape over to anyone at CCPN. "Alright! So we're here to get the two of you to get along much better. Because we all know its better to get along then to not." Iris started out with, much to the high amusement of Joe who had to hide his growing smile behind a hand.

"Hey I thought we were getting along just fine." Added the Flash with a shake of the head, making Eddie scoff at his words.

"If you call harassment of me as getting along." The sarcasm in the Detective's words could be heard by everybody.

Barry turned to him with a fake look of hurt on his face. "How can you call that harassment!? That in no way was harassment!"

God how Cisco wished he had popcorn for this! Iris loudly cleared her throat to get the attention of two of her favorite men. Which thankfully worked. "Unfortunately Flash, that is harassment and is why we're here." Even if it was really amusing at times.

Eddie whooped in joy at getting his girlfriend's support while Barry merely scoffed at the whole notion as he crossed his arms. "Everyone here knows that the two of you could do a lot of good if you both got along. Now yeah, Eddie starting the task force was a bad idea but mistakes happen! God knows I've made a few over the years." Oh yeah, Barry was definitely aware of those too. Not that he could use any of that material against her in this situation considering she and Eddie still had no clue about his being the Flash.

"I'll be nice if Daffy over here apologizes for the task force."

"You attacked me! What'd you expect me to do after that!?" Eddie protested while ignoring the Daffy slight.

Barry looked at him in a way that suggested he thought the other man was dumb, but no one was entirely sure of however thanks to his blurred face. In reality, he was actually just making a face at him. "Well… Not that! I would have accepted you getting on tv or something and asking to meet so you could get my side of the story. But nooooo! Big bad Pretty Boy you are just had to get that started!" The Speedster had jumped out of his chair at that point and was flailing his arms about as if he were in distress over the whole thing. Joe just thought the boy was showboating and was likely right too!

Eddie scoffed at the show the other man was putting on and wished he could just leave. Iris was getting ready to intervene while Professor Wells was shaking his head at the whole thing. _Why on God's green Earth can't Mr. Allen be more serious!?_

Quite frankly, the whole thing was making him want to pull out his hair! "And don't call me Pretty Boy! Or Daffy for that matter."

"Why?"

"Why what?" Wasn't it obvious!? He hated Daffy Duck and he never liked being called a Pretty Boy cause he felt it was somehow insulting!

"Why can't I call you those things?" His act of confusion was either real or highly staged and unfortunately for Eddie he really couldn't tell which it was.

Caitlin had to admit though this was the best entertainment she'd had in some time, even if it was really childish. Cisco and Joe were both along the point they were ready to break out in laughter while Linda's smile was really wide and trying to keep her hands steady enough to hold the camera. She was going to have to do something really nice for her man after all this was over with. Oliver was torn between amusement and wanting to chastise Barry for his actions, the laughter from Felicity in his ear however kept him from doing it as he wasn't particularly interested in dealing with her 'Loud Voice' if he stopped the fun.

Eddie looked at the Speedster with an annoyed expression on his face and Iris was at least happy he hadn't gotten out of his chair yet. "Because I'm not either of those things!" His proclamation caused the Flash to give a gasp of shock at that as he held a hand to his heart.

"Say what!? Does that mean you're Duffy the Ugly Boy then!?" Came the shocked question that had Eddie out of his chair and the Flash zipping away from him and back to his own chair with a laugh.

Bursts of laughter that was trying to be contained could be heard from Joe despite the glare he was getting from his daughter. "Whoa! Eddie just calm down okay? Please, just get back into your chair so that we can keep this from getting bad." Iris said soothingly while shooting another glare towards the Flash for his goading. Naturally, he merely smiled and shrugged his shoulders at her that only made her glare seemingly intensify more.

Reluctantly, Eddie sat back down in his chair while fixing the Flash with a glare of his own. "Are you trying to tell us you're constipated?"

The innocent sounding question made the Detective ball up a fist while he struggled to keep a lid on his growing rage. "Please Flash can you stop and be serious!? You two getting along is really important to me!" Pleaded Iris and while Barry was willing to do almost anything for her, this was just too much fun.

Putting up his hands in a defensive gesture, the Speedster informed her he was only looking out for her Pretty Boy's good health! "its not a crime is it? I mean last I knew its not a crime but if it somehow became one that would really be uncool. So uncool not even Captain Cold could cool it." He added while being completely serious about it.

"And that guy is a master of Cool." Cisco helpfully added in, earning him a thumb's up from the Flash in the process.

Iris could only sigh. "No, that's not a crime here in Central City. Or anywhere for that matter."

"You sure? Cause things can get real wild out there in the world ya know. Like things going boom and giving you super powers wild. So its entirely possible that asking about one's health is a crime."

"Yes, I'm very sure."

She got two thumbs up and what looked to be a big cheesy grin in response to that. "Okay then! I believe ya!" His words made Eddie look at him in disbelief, something that Barry was quick to catch on too.

"What? Is something on me now?"

"How is she not getting the third degree!?"

"That's easy, she's really cute and I go for cute girls." Despite herself, the lovely Miss West couldn't help but blush prettily at that compliment.

Her boyfriend on the other hand didn't like that at all. _That's my boy! _Cheered Joe.

"Why thank you Flash, you know how to make a girl's day." She told him with a beaming smile that made Eddie insanely jealous.

"Anytime Miss West, anytime." Barry told her flirtingly.

Caitlin chose then to clear her throat so that things could get back on track, much to the happiness of one Detective Eddie Thawne. Looking around sheepishly, Iris quickly got herself back on track. "Right, so um... Moving on. As I was saying before, the two of you could do some real good together in this city if you just got along better. If an apology has to happen and its needed from both sides, then so be it. Flash can even tell his side of things about that night and then we can move on. The two of you could bring hope and even laughter to those who need it." Her strong finishing end made her dad a bit teary eyed as he couldn't help but feel so proud of his daughter for her beliefs.

Even Harrison felt moved by it but he had a strong suspicion it wasn't going to sway Mr. Allen entirely. At which point, he would be lucky that Miss West would only be angry with one half of him. "The girl's right Flash. You've done enough to get back at the Detective." Arrow spoke up and drawing everybody's attention towards him.

While Eddie wasn't entirely sold on the green clothed vigilante, he was at least happy the man was on his side. "But he makes it so easy! I mean I'd happily move on to someone else if he'd just stop reacting!" Barry protested to Oliver and making Eddie grimace.

And as if to prove his point, he started bouncing around everywhere while yelling out 'whoo-hoo-hoo!' all over the place. Making the Arrow, Wells, Iris, and Caitlin facepalm theirselves. And seeing the Arrow of all people do that is just something to see, and Linda had it all on camera! Or what she could get anyway due to her laughing. Joe and Cisco were pretty much laughing their heads off as well now. Iris was full on glaring at the red clad Speedster and wishing she could throw something heavy at him while her boyfriend tried to ignore it as best he could. But in the end, he jumped up from his chair and stormed off with a growl and a muttered 'I hate him!' after the Flash had yelled out 'Despicable Thawne!' in the voice of Daffy Duck.

It didn't take long for Iris to follow after her boyfriend. _That man is impossible! _She really hoped he wouldn't pass that along to any easily impressionable kids as the last thing anyone needed was children pulling Flash antics. Never again though would she try something like this as it was just too much of a headache for her! However, she failed to see her father trip the Speedster when the boy got near him. Which sent poor Barry sliding across the floor but thankfully not into anything. Caitlin for once didn't have a problem with that as he wasn't hurt aside from possibly pride and was smiling pretty widely herself.

Joe had a smug grin on his face after that as he finally got some payback for what his boy did to him during that wild party in the streets a few weeks ago. Something that Wells had actually punished him for with more interesting ways of training, but this? This was SO much more satisfying! "Owie..." Barry muttered as he got back up and gave his surrogate father a glare.

"Hey, you messed with fire Bear. Its only natural you get burned right back." Joe told him with a shrug of his shoulders and a smile. While knowing that Bear would probably get payback on him later.

"Oh its _so _on!" Barry replied with a big grin that had everybody else aside from Linda and Cisco shaking their heads at the antics of the two.

Joe merely give him a 'bring it on' gesture and informed his boy that he was ready for him anytime, anywhere. Sure, he knew he was bound to be in for an earful from his daughter about how much of a failure this was, but he had to admit it was one of the most hilarious things he'd seen yet. The father was going to have to ensure he got a copy from Linda too as it was too good not to have! Cisco had the same line of thinking too and would be a great way to get his mind off family matters anytime it reared its ugly head.

"Now that Miss West's hopes and dreams have been horribly dashed, I suggest we get on with the usual." As really, Wells had had about enough of the nonsense for the day and it really was time to get serious again. Though a strong part of him wished that Tes was here for this as he knew she would have enjoyed this scene greatly.

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**Author's Notes: Well so much for that intervention! Maybe better luck next time Iris! The next chapter for this fic is where I plan to finally cover the aftermath of Eddie's being told the truth about Barry being the Flash. Something I can't wait to write! Also, for those of you that follow What If? Making The Call, I've set up a new poll related to Oliver learinng the truth about his mom and Walter's relationship. So please, do be sure to check that out and vote! And with that… R and R!**


	11. The Truth is so Revealing!

**The Truth Is**

**So Revealing!**

**Disclaimer: I own not a single thing but what you see here in this idea. Apologies if I may have gotten certain sequences of events out of order. And sweet lord baby Jesus and Hallelujah! I can update again!**

**Summary: After Eddie gets past the bombshell of learning who the Flash is in 1x17, the man is definitely not a happy camper.**

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Out of all the things Eddie had been expecting upon coming to the lab, learning who the Flash really was and that he needed to lie to Iris about Mason's disappearance was the absolute last thing for him to have expected. And after Barry had changed into regular clothes and he and Joe explained things to Eddie, parts of which he really didn't like. Like lying to Iris for one, it had taken him at least ten minutes to snap out of his shock and into some anger. "So not only are you the Flash, but you want me to lie to Iris about you being the Flash and about what really happened to Mason? Iris, who is my girlfriend, my partner's daughter, and your best friend? That about sum it up?"

The sarcasm could be heard in his voice and it made the two wince. "Well you missed a few things but uhh… Yeah, that sums it up." Barry responded back with a rub to the back of his head in sheepishness.

Eddie just slapped his hands on his sides in mild exasperation. "Good to know."

"Look, we can discuss this all later at STAR Labs where we'll have more privacy. Now let's get going cause I'm getting hungry." Joe jumped in while grabbing his coat and walking away.

"I could use a few good home cooked meals." Barry added in with a smile as he could practically eat Iris' cooking all day long.

With a roll of his eyes and a shake of the head, Eddie grabbed his own coat as he followed Joe out the door with Barry not far behind and thoughts full of food and the problems he's dealing with currently. The Speedster wondered though when the blonde was going to start flipping out on him and Joe over the whole thing. And over all the stuff he'd done to him, which…. When he thought about it, Barry was honestly surprised he wasn't doing that already! _I did do a lot of crazy crap to him after all._ He knows he's just taunting karma but he can't help it!

Heck, maybe the guy would trip on something when he decided to chase after him in a rage and he'd get a good laugh out of it! Lord knows he needed it after the wrist bomb and having to see his dad go back to prison. Little did he know that Joe was wondering when his partner would flip out as well and was really looking forward to it as he could use a lot of amusement himself. As they quickly made their way into the parking lot, a few thoughts started to trickle into one Detective Eddie Thawne's head.

_Soooo Barry's the Flash of all things and I have to lie to Iris about that which is not a good thing at all. So many things could go wrong with something like that and I could lose her over this secret. Then there's the whole harassment thing…_ He trailed off as he came to a realization as his eyes widened.

_All this time… For months I've been getting harassed by the Flash! Who is Barry Allen! Barry… Who is the Flash… Who liked to harass me to the point of my getting real angry… Anger I'm starting to feel right now. ALLLLLLLEN! _Ohh yeah, he was starting to get mad folks!

"You know, it just occurred to me..."

Joe and Barry turned back towards him with curiousity on their faces over what the man had just possibly realized and Joe himself was almost giddy at the prospect. "Yeah?" The good West asked.

Giving a look to his partner that was returned in equal measure, Eddie then fixed a look right at Barry Allen and it wasn't an entirely happy one either! _Ohh here we go._

"You! You have been harassing me for months! Harassment that also included public humiliation! Do you know what that does to a guy!? HUH!? DO YOU!?"

Oh how Joe was looking amused now! Barry was trying his hardest not to look all that amused but it was hard to pull off. "I…. Might know a little something about that yeah." Tony Woodward and all the bullies from back in the day and all that.

"WELL IT PAILS IN COMPARISON TO ALL THE SUFFERING I WENT THROUGH ALLEN!" Roared out Eddie furiously and charged at Barry who quickly got out of the way.

Glaring in full on rage at his speeding nemesis and grinding his teeth very hard, he lunged at the annoyance of his life only to miss once again. The smirk on Barry's face as he leaned up against a vehicle with his arms crossed doing nothing to damper his growing rage. "Way too slow man!" The Speedster called out cheerfully.

Growling, Eddie charged at him only to wind up tripping over one of the cement dividers that block a vehicle from going further into a parking space. Sending not only Barry into a fit of laughter, but Joe as well! Joe could also be heard clapping his hands together as he doubled over laughing his butt off. "Ow…." Groaned out Eddie as he stayed where he was, hoping it would save any dignity he had left.

_I will get you Barry! I know who you are now and you will regret it! I'll get you in your sleep if I have too! _And since it hurt to laugh out loud, he just laughed crazy like in his head while a big smile appeared on his face as he laid where he was. Oh yes, vengeance would be his!

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**Author's Notes: May this have been worth the wait!**


	12. Getting Back At The Rogues!

**Getting Back At**

**The Rogues!**

**Disclaimer: Boy has it been awhile since I updated this, many apologies for that! As previously mentioned, Wells is just Wells and Eobard is just Eobard. If I am thinking correctly, this would pretty much take place some time after the 'A Speedster in Nanda Parbat' chapter.**

**Summary: After Barry and his friends were betrayed by Cold and the Rogues when moving the Pipeline prisoners to a more safer location, Barry decides to get back at the Rogues for their actions.**

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Hours after Barry and the rest of his friends were betrayed by the Snarts and Rory, the Speedster was still highly annoyed over the whole thing. Wells' 'I told you so' moment hadn't helped things either since the man had definitely not been in approval of the plan to work with the Rogues whatsoever. So annoyed was the Speedster that he decided to go and find where the Rogues were and thanks to the information removal he did earlier, he had a pretty good idea of the possible locations they might be at since he took a look at them before deleting any of it. He also figured he'd do something similar to his actions at Nanda Parbat and leave a note for Snart that they were even now.

Getting a hold of the Glitter Cannon, a camera, some paint, several rolls of toilet paper, and a device capable of emitting very loud noises that also came with specialized ear plugs, the Speedster sped all through out the city until he finally came across a house that on the outside looked to be in bad need of a fix up and saw three particular people he'd been looking for. Smirking to himself, he opened up the three cans of paint that were yellow, pink, and purple and dipped three brushes into them and took off all around the house to give it the paint job of the year by mostly leaving zig zag lines on the walls.

Toilet paper was then thrown everywhere before he finally put on the ear plugs and put the device near the porch where it wouldn't be easily seen and hit the button to activate it. Smirking again, he sped over to the edge of the lawn and crossed his arms in victory as the device made its beautiful music. It wasn't long before Leonard Snart made his appearance with his cold gun and he was most certainly not a happy camper! "What the Hell is go-AUGH!" Barry chose then to blast him with the Glitter Cannon and causing the man to stumble back into the door way in shock as Barry then sped off to the side of the house to not be seen.

"Snart! The Hell happened!?" Yelled out Mick Rory questioningly as he walked across his partner and onto the porch with his heat gun to find out what made the man fall down in shock and covered with glitter while that god awful sound kept going off.

Barry chose then to speed paint him in the three colors of paint he had, then threw some toilet paper at him while leaving the Glitter Cannon for last. Rory's screams of rage could be barely heard over the loud noises from the device as he stumbled around while our favorite Speedster laughed his butt off a bit. Lisa then chose to burst out of the house with her gold gun and it would be her who found the device and ended its life with a blast from her gun. "Aww, why'd ya have to go and do that for!?"

Lisa aimed her gun right at the Speedster who had a big grin on his face and that just didn't settle well with her at all! "How'd you even find us!?" She chose to ask instead as he shouldn't have been able too unless that cute engineer had something to do with it!

And if he did, well… She'd just have to have a little talk with him then about the importance of not giving out certain bits of information! "I have my ways." Was the myseterious answer from the Flash and Lisa frowned unhappily at him over it.

She sent a blast of gold in his direction but to her annoyance he sped out of the way of it with that grin still on his face. "Gonna have to be faster than that!"

A blast of cold from her brother also yielded little results and soon to the annoyance of both, their guns along with Mick's were at the edge of the lawn! "Yeeeaaah…. I don't think so with those. You guys betrayed me and my friends and nearly got us all killed because of that. Which was so not cool and shows that you guys probably can't even be trusted with the well being of a puppy."

His words did not sit well with Lisa since she loved furry little fellas like puppies! Now her brother and Mick on the other hand, yeah… They couldn't be trusted but at least she could be! "I take offense to that Flash!" Called out the girl unhappily with her arms crossed.

"I'm sorry, did you say you completely agree with that accurate statement?"

Instead of answering him, she merely charged at him with full intent to kick his ass! Only to get the Glitter Cannon treatment and a picture taken! "Ooh! Cisco is gonna love this!"

What!? No! There was no way Lisa could let that cute engineer see her like this! And so she tried to get the camera from him in a futile attempt that left her very, very angry. And left her with only her underwear on for that matter! Something that was actually a Victoria's Secret set she decided to wear since she knew she was going to get to see Cisco and wanted to feel extra sexy cause of it. A nother picture was taken by a smirking Barry and she charged again only to get wrapped in toilet paper!

Barry sped off to the edge of the yard again with a very happy smile on his face. "Hey Lenny, check the note on your chest!" And with that, he was out of there and feeling very satisfied with the end result!

Leonard, frowning to himself while trying not to break into a full on rage like Mick and Lisa were doing, grabbed said note off his chest that the annoying Speedster had apparently placed on himself. "Consider us even. F."

_Well played Barry Allen, well played. But we are far from even as revenge is a dish best served cold and in due time it will be! _He didn't give a crap about the others Barry boy worked with as it was just Barry himself he wanted revenge against and he had a feeling Lisa and Mick would be very willing to take part in getting the Speeding menace back!

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**Author's Notes: Wah ha ha ha! Was nice writing this one! Hope you all enjoyed and R and R!**


	13. Iris' Revenge

**Iris' Revenge!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but what you see here. This is set during season 2 before the big Flash/Zoom fight and Larkin's death and in my version, Eddie and Ronnie are NOT dead but Eobard is and Wells is pretty happy over that. Patty and Barry have also become really good friends as well. Jax is a part of the group however as it was learned he could do things with fire and they wanted to at least find a way to make things up to him for what the Particle Accelerator had cost him.**

**Summary: Iris decides that a little payback on Barry is in order.**

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For some time now, one Iris West, soon to be Iris West-Thawne had been planning something involving her best friend Barry 'The Flash' Allen. While she had forgiven him, her dad, and Eddie for lying to her about his being the Flash, she had definitely been carrying some annoyance towards the boy for his part in the intervention plan some months back. A plan that had definitely not gone all that well that night much to her dislike. But at least now he no longer annoyed Eddie as he found others to do it too. Word has it that the Arrow or Green Arrow or whatever he's calling himself now was also looking for a little payback against Barry. Though why that was she wasn't sure and anytime she asked Bear about it all he'd do is start laughing and be pretty much useless after that. There's also a rumor that Captain Cold was also out to get him back too for something he apparently did. Of course Cisco claimed he had it on good authority that Lisa Snart was dead set on some payback as well.

Which… When she thought about it, explained the black eye Barry had been sporting for a short time after the girl had come to them for help with her criminal of a father! Unfortunately, Iris couldn't really rely on anybody to help her out with this. Though she got why Doctor Wells and his jerky Earth-2 counterpart wanted nothing to do with it even if their Wells thought it amusing that she was even trying anything. She couldn't exactly go to Patty either since that girl was still in the dark about Barry's identity and the reporter thought the two were cute and probably would be a thing if it wasn't for the fact he's happily involved with Linda. She also wasn't sure if Jay would be willing either.

So before coming to work, she snuck into Barry's lab at the precinct and put an image of Freddy Krueger as his screen saver on the computers there since she knew he hated the sight of that figure ever since he was a kid. Something Tony had a lot to do with as well. Also before coming to work, she left a Freddy doll on his bed at her dad's place even though he tended to spend a lot of his time at Linda's and she wondered when exactly he would just move in with her. If Iris could have, she would have changed his ring tone to something related to the character but unfortunately wasn't able too! But she couldn't wait for his reaction the next time she saw him! "Well well, what has you smiling so widely?" Came the curious voice of one Linda Park.

Iris looked over at her with that big smile still on her face. "Oh, you know, its just a wonderful day is all."

Linda studied her for a moment as if trying to see if she could really buy that or not, but fate had other plans in mind. "YOU!" Came the loud and quite unhappy voice of one Barry Allen! And causing quite a few at the news building to look his way and holding some sort of doll.

Both girls could clearly tell he was upset and Linda immediately went over to him while Iris stayed where she was as she tried not to start laughing as he twisted the little Freddy doll in his hands. "Babe! What's wrong!?" And why the mistreatment of that Freddy Krueger doll!?

"This! This is what's wrong! Found this on my bed earlier before work and now my bed is ruined! Then I found him as a screen saver!" God how he hated this horror character!

Iris couldn't contain the laughter any longer as Linda looked on confused as to why her friend was laughing about this and how exactly a Freddy Krueger doll of all things could ruin his bed! Barry gently pushed past his girlfriend to go and confront Iris with everyone else watching. "Did you do this!? You know how much I hate Freddy, Iris!"

"Ha ha! Oh ha ha, Barry! Revenge ha… Is sweet!" Got out the girl as she continued to laugh and Linda suddenly had a light bulb moment over the whole thing.

_Ohhh girl!_ She had to admit though that this was pretty amusing!

"Revenge!? Revenge for what exactly!?" Really, he hadn't done anything lately that would merit this kind of thing!

Finally getting control of herself, she quickly told him what it was for and he gaped at her like a fish. "But that was months ago!"

"Mm-hmm… But the best revenge is carefully planned out Bear."

The Central City Speedster suddenly had a horrific image of Iris sharing his fear of the Freddy character with Captain Cold and it was enough to make him shiver! No telling what that man or his sister would do with that kind of knowledge! "You uhh.. You haven't shared this particular fear of mine with the Snarts have you? Cause I SO don't need them using that against me. Like… Ever."

His mentioning of them made her awfully curious but it gave her a wonderful idea! "Oooh… You know what Bear? I just might have while Lisa was around." She told him with a grin that only got bigger when he groaned and rubbed his head.

She then turned around and making sure to block his view of her desk drawer, she pulled out a certain hat and placed it on, and then pulled on a special glove that had been the stuff of nightmares. Barry was too caught up in his mild paranoia over the Snarts now knowing a secret like that and what they might be planning to do with that knowledge. Heck, Leonard Snart could be telling his fellow inmates about it this moment! "Oh, and Barry?"

Her voice drew him out of his wild thinking as Linda and the others watched on in curiousity and amusement. "Yeah Iris?"

Barry would get the answer to that when his best friend suddenly spun around and pointed a finger at him with a very noticeable glove on. "Welcome to my nightmare!" Spoke up the girl in a creepy sounding voice.

The sight of Iris wearing Freddy's hat and that damnedable glove was enough to freak him the Hell out and he took off like a Bat out of Hell! Thankfully without using his super speed and Linda couldn't help but burst into laughter at the reaction! The Sports reporter couldn't wait to tease him over this! Iris watched her friend in amusement and looked down at the Freddy glove with a victorious smile on her face. "Revenge is _SO _sweet."

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**Author's Notes: Heh… Hope you guys enjoyed this one! I'm not much of a fan of Freddy myself but I thought this would make for some great amusement as a way for her to get payback on Barry for the Intervention disaster. But damn though with the recent Flash episode, wonder how Patty is gonna deal after those events? R and R!**


	14. Lisa's Revenge

**Lisa's Revenge**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but what you see here. And now its time for a little revenge Lisa Snart style! Huge apologies for the lack of updates for this, I honestly haven't had a great deal of inspiration til recently. And I warn you guys now, this is gonna be kinda dirty minded and Porky's inspired.**

**Summary: Lisa's got the perfect plan to get revenge on the Flash for his little prank against her, her brother, and Mick.**

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It'd taken some planning and getting certain need to know information from her big brother about the Flash's identity. Which hadn't been too hard to get since he was feeling fairly vindictive towards the guy ever since he pulled his little prank on them for their betrayal with the Meta-Humans. Once learning of Henry Allen's freedom, it'd been easy to track him down and even get him to go along with what she was planning as payback. It helped that he felt it was only proper after he learned of the antics his son got up too. Some of it while funny wasn't always proper in his view and figured it was only right he help the girl out. Even if it was pretty much in the area of naughtyness that he wouldn't normally associate with.

Lisa though could take comfort in the fact that even Cisco wasn't too happy with Mr. Quickie for what he did to her that night with the Glitter Cannon and the loss of clothes. Course he made it clear he did NOT want to know what she was planning as the less he knew the better. Of course she had a sneaking suspicion that her man just wanted to find even more amusement in the whole thing when she finally struck back at his friend. And once the video was ready for proper viewing, she had it mailed to STAR Labs for Barry Allen's eyes only. Lisa also made sure to be in a very good hiding spot that even he wouldn't think to look in. Something Cisco Ramon was only too happy to help out with and led her to learning of the Time Vault and a fairly annoyed and cranky AI who was none too pleased with what the two were doing in there.

Barry thanked Caitlin for bringing him the package with a slight frown on his face as getting mail for him here was a bit on the weird side in his view. Sitting down at the computer station, he quickly tore open the package, removed the safety around the item, and grew even more curious when he realized it was a cd or perhaps even a dvd. Wondering what the heck it could be, he popped it inside the computer's cd tray and closed it up. It wasn't long before a screen came up with a smiling Lisa Snart. _Guess I need to have a word with __Cold__ about telling certain secrets…_

"_Good evening and welcome to A Good Time with me as your host. Now keep in mind this is our first show but I'm pretty sure we'll be a hit in the future, allowing us to vastly improve as time goes on._"

Barry was wondering what the Hell Lisa was talking about as no way she and her brother were going to try and start up some talk show as it was just too weird. Then again, maybe it would keep them and maybe Mick Rory out of his hair if they did something a bit more legit then stealing money and whatever else that caught their fancy. "_Now the purpose of A Good Time is to give former inmates one Hell of a good time with a few lovely girls. So if you're a former inmate who was in for a good long while, we are just the answer to your needs._" A sinking feeling was growing in the Speedster's gut and he could only hope like crazy that he was wrong.

"_Tonight's first guest who is very, and I mean very special for us is none other then recently released inmate Henry Allen. A former doctor who was framed for the murder of his wife, thankfully the real culprit was discovered and this great man was freed after 15 years in prison._" Henry himself showed up with a happy smile on his face and shook Lisa's hand happily. Who also had a pleased smile on her face.

Barry's eyes widened in absolute shock as he could hardly believe what was going on! "_Now Henry, we are absolutely pleased you could join us tonight._" She told him as she stayed closer to him then Barry cared for.

"_Well I can safely tell you I am quite happy to be here Lisa. Though I admit I was very surprised to be reached out too like this, but happy none the less._"

The fact Henry himself wasn't even pulling away made the whole thing that much more worse for the red clad Speedster's growing horror. _My dad is WAY too close to her! She's a super villain for God's sake!_

He wanted to pull out his hair and scream out about how wrong this whole thing was at the top of his lungs. The fact this was karma for all the crap he pulled on people didn't even register in his freaked out state of mind. In the video, he watched as Lisa rubbed his dad's arm with that smile still on her face and he spun around at super speed over the action. "_I am happy to hear that Henry, and these ladies walking up to us are just as happy._"

Three very beautiful women in lingerie walked up to the two and Lisa parted from Henry to allow the women to swarm all over him. One girl even let a long pack of condoms fall down his chest as she hovered over his shoulder. Barry's eyes bulged out as he made noises while managing to miss the looks he was getting from Caitlin and Dr. Wells. "Will… Frame… Her!" Got out the Speedster and not even caring about how wrong that line of thought was in that moment!

The other two looked at one another before shrugging their shoulders and going back to their work. As they figured if Barry needed to talk, they were always ready. No matter what that talk might be about. "_Ooh Mr. Allen, I think you and I should go into this room and have a little fun!_"

Henry chuckled a little nervously. _"Well if that's what you think we should do then how can I say no to that?_"

"YOU CAN SAY NO CAUSE OF MOM! THE WOMAN YOU WERE MARRIED TOO!"Yelled out the freaked Speedster and causing Caitlin to rush over to him in a panic.

"Barry! What's going on!?" Asked the doctor in a worried voice.

With a whimper, he pointed to the screen and she went wide eyed in shock over Mr. Allen and a barely dressed woman flirting. "Oh my..." She had no idea the older man had it in him!

_Then again, I suppose after years of confinement, one would need a bit of pleasure in their lives…_

Ohh if only she knew! If only she knew! Henry and the redheaded woman went into the room and made sure to close the door to ensure their privacy. Ten minutes later groans and other things could be heard much to the horror of Barry who's eyes were practically bulging as he spun around in circles. The sight of it made Dr. Wells wish they could give the young man something to calm him down as it was highly distracting. He also wondered why the Hell the obviously pornagraphic video Henry Allen was apparently part of wasn't being shut off by the young man. _Must be in too much shock. The same I suspect Caitlin is in no doubt._

"_Oh sweet Jesus! You are too much Henry!_" Shouted the woman through the door and Lisa's eyebrows went up in surprise over that as the remaining two girls giggled.

The door opened moments later and the redhead stuck her head out and she looked very disheveled and also very sweaty. "_Girls! I think I'm gonna need your help cause this man has way too much energy for me to handle by my lonesome!_"

Her friends got wide grins on their faces and quickly went inside and Barry got a glimpse of his father on a bed and it just made him flip the Hell out even more as Caitlin's shock increased even further to the point she couldn't even do anything but watch onwards. Time speeds up in the video and the caption says an hour and a half has passed and Lisa can be seen sitting in a chair reading a magazine and sipping on a cup of something or other when a very satisfied and smiling Henry Allen comes out of that room with the three women trailing along with smiles of their own. Lisa quickly got out of her chair and walked over to the four. "_My oh my Mr. Allen, maybe I should have joined in._" She told him huskily as she got a good look at the very tired out girls.

Henry chuckled at her. "_Maybe when I'm next in Central we can get together?_"

"Gak!" Barry was pretty much hyperventilating at that point as he watched his dad and the super villain flirt with one another as the three girls stayed very close to him.

Lisa turned her attention back to the camera after a few minutes of talk that pretty much broke Barry's brain, along with Caitlin's to a degree. "_I think this was a fantastic first episode and I hope to those watching this that you greatly enjoyed! Good night everybody!_"

The screen went black and credits began to roll and at the end of it came the words 'Never f**k with a Snart. For we _ALWAYS _get payback.'

Silence reigned through out the main cortex as a red faced Barry raised up his balled up fists and Dr. Wells and Caitlin watched on in worry. Well as much worry as Caitlin could even really feel in that moment anyway thanks to the contents of the video. That woman was so damned horrible in the doctor's opinion to do something like this! Barry's mouth opened several times and all that could be heard was squeaks at first until finally a word came out of his mouth. "LLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAA!" Shouted out the enraged, red faced Speedster as he shook his fists and quickly grabbed his suit and went out in search of the Snart girl.

His scream of rage could practically be heard all the way in Metropolis and National City while Caitlin went temporarily death from the unexpected shout. Inside the Time Vault, Lisa could be seen laughing her head off much to Cisco's amusement. "Let me guess, that shout was Barry over what ever you got him back for?"

She nodded quite happily. "Mm-hmm!"

"I don't know what it was, but I have to say you did extremely good work." Praised the engineer and Lisa made future plans to tell her man all about what happened.

"Why thank you baby." Purred the girl as she kissed him soundly and the two got back to what they were doing previously before the shout of rage much to the disgust and annoyance of Gideon.

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**Author's Notes: I am probably going to Hell for this one but that's okay. This was hilariously fun to do and I really hope you all enjoyed it! If you've ever seen Porky's you may remember a certain scene where the boys think they are about to have some fun with a girl and the girl and two of the boys, along with another guy are all messing with them. If you haven't seen it yet, go watch it! But go in with an open mind as it can be dirty in a lot of ways. Anywho… R and R!**


	15. I'll Be Your Super Friend!

**I'll Be**

**Your Super Friend!**

**Disclaimer: Holy Hellballs has it been awhile since I updated this! And if it hadn't of been for the Musical recently, this probably wouldn't even be getting an update! Eddie and Iris, Barry and Linda, Ronnie and Caitlin are all still together and quite happy in their respective relationships. Ronnie and Caitlin also have a little boy as well and the Jay Garrick who first showed up is the actual Earth-2 Jay Garrick while Zoom is a former LoA member. Which is a nice little nod to a certain chapter of mine in Possibilities. James and Kara are a happy couple as well and Cat never left. Nor did Jesse leave for Earth-3 as Jay of Earth-2 volunteered to keep an eye on things there in addition to his own Earth. Laurel is not dead and is happily involved with Oliver. Original Wells is still alive as well and Martin Stein and Jax are off with the Legends since he can combine with Stein as well since Ronnie's being busy being a father. **

**Also, after a lot of harrassment on Barry's part where Ra's is concerned, Roy was never forced to fake his death thanks to the man not trying to ruin things in order to make Oliver accept being the Heir.**

**Summary: Thinking one of his best friends is in need of a little cheering up after his brutal kidnapping, Barry pays Oliver a visit.**

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For several days after the whole Music Meister affair, Barry had been humming and singing various songs while even dancing a little. And even doing so in Star City after it had grated enough on Eddie and Dr. Wells' nerves to the point they both had a lightbulb moment and suggested he bring some of that cheer to Oliver who was clearly in need of it after being in the brutal hands of a mad man for 6 days straight. An idea Barry quickly ran with and had been in Star for a day and a half. Rene wanted nothing to do with any of it as it was just a little bit too ridiculous in his view. Thea had gotten a kick out of the whole thing and even joined in on it much to Oliver's annoyance. Curtis had even done it a little too until a glare from Oliver pretty much stopped him in his tracks. "_I'm your super friend!_" Sang out Barry as he breezed about in the Bunker.

"Barry..." Began the tired archer.

But the Speedster paid him no mind as he continued to sing and even dance. "Barry!"

"Huh? Oh, how can I help you my green super friend?"

A glower came his way that did nothing to dampen Barry's spirits. "You can quit with the singing!"

"But… You need a pick me up after what you went through!"

"No. I don't. I just need a little time to deal with everything."

"And spiral down into depression and self blame? Yeah, I don't think that's a good idea, Oliver. Especially when that's probably what this year's nutjob wants!"

The man sighed in aggravation. As he knew his friend was right but not wanting to admit it. Barry began to sing and dance again. "_A little love into your heart is just what you need! And I hear a certain gal with quite the Cry will do the trick in a jiff!_"

"I don't wanna burden her."

"_But what you don't know, my green clad friend, is that a part of love is sharing the burdens! So put a little love into your life and let it grow like a garden!_"

"I need a drink. And a special room that can only be locked from the inside."

"_We'll have a drink together and even clink our glasses together! Cause that's what friends do!_"

Oliver grimaced and then considered it. "Fine, but you're using Caitlin's perfected Mixture to get as drunk as me."

Barry shot him two thumbs up and sped off to get what he needed while Oliver dug out some of the Whiskey they kept stashed down in the Bunker. "I'm gonna find a way to prevent him from getting in here in the future. One way or another." Grumbled the man sourly.

But the man did have to admit that his friend did have a point where Laurel was concerned. Hell, the fact he was more or less keeping her at arm's length was hurting her and he hated himself for that. Plus, it was probably just what Adrian and Talia wanted for that matter too. Barry was soon back with Caitlin's perfected Mixture in tow. "_We two Super Friends are gonna drink and drink and have a merry old time while we clink our glasses together! Cause that's what Super Friends do!_"

Nothing was said by the other man as he poured the Speedster a drink who then added a few drops of what he needed into it and the two clinked their shot glasses together and drank. And it wasn't long before both were drunk off their asses thanks to more then one bottle of Whiskey both Oliver and Diggle had in the Bunker. Loud singing would also erupt from not only Barry but Oliver too thanks to the fact he was drunker then he'd been in a good long while. Which honestly surprised his team members when they made their way into the Bunker. Rene and Curtis had even been out on the field when the singing somehow managed to start coming through their Comms much to their bewilderment. "_He'll run really fast while I'll shoot an arrow into you! __And all because we're Team Flarrow!_" Drunkenly sang Oliver as he wobbled about with Barry on the other side and singing along as well.

"And now… I think I really have seen everything." Quipped Diggle with a shake of the head.

And causing Laurel and the others with him to agree on that! "_Just know I'll be there in a flash cause I'm your Super Friend!_"

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**Author's Notes: Well, probably not that great but hopefully its a little funny at least.**


End file.
